Being a first time mom is the adventure of a lifetime, literally a lifetime. This little one is going nowhere anytime soon and no matter how much time passes you will always be his or her mom. Becoming a mom for the first time changes your life in so many ways and you have so many questions about how it will really be, so I thought I would tell you a little bit about my experience of being a first time mom during the first six weeks and the reality thereof.
Sleep while you can. Everyone says it, you don’t believe it.
Before your baby arrives, everyone tells you to sleep while you can. After your baby arrives they tell you: “Sleep when the baby sleeps”. The reality is; they are right. You should sleep as much as you can while you can and when you can for as long as you can. Enjoy every moment of it.
The first night when we brought our little one home from hospital, me and my husband did not sleep until 7am the next morning. For some or other reason he kept on crying and would not sleep. We looked and felt like zombies. At some point we looked at each other and asked “How are we going to do this?”. Some mornings we would wake up and not know how he got into our bed, but somehow he did and somehow I did feed him during the night. On other days your can literally not keep your eyes open.
My advice to you:
Sleep when the baby sleeps. Even if you are not a cat nap kind of person, you will become one. During the tired days when that little one closes his eyes to sleep, you should close your eyes as well and at least try to sleep for an hour or half an hour or ten minutes. Take whatever you can get. It helps.
Burping is hard work.
If you don’t know this yet, during each feed and after each feed, you need to burp your baby. Babies tend to swallow air while feeding and if they are not burped frequently it can lead to spitting up, fussiness and eventually tummy ache.
Some babies burp easily, when you just move them from one breast to the other they burp. For other babies it doesn’t come easy, I got one of those. Sometimes burping would take longer than feeding and sometimes the wind would just not come out no matter how long we burped him and how many ways we tried to burp him.
My advice to you:
You don’t want a difficult to handle baby so just take the time and burp him properly during and after feedings, even though it takes some time. The nurse at the hospital told us to use Telament Colic Drops, as she explained it binds all the little air bubbles into bigger bubbles so that it comes out easier. For us, this was a life saver. Talk to your pediatrician or nurse and find out if this or something similar could work for your baby if you find it difficult to burp him.
Outfit of the day: Pajamas
You would think the least you can do is put on a decent outfit and brush your hair. No, just accept you might be too tired or just not in the mood to get dressed. You will anyway spend the most of your day in bed or on the couch feeding and bonding with your baby.
My advice to you:
Don’t feel bad if you spend the first few weeks mostly in your pajamas. No one expects you to look your best and most of the time you will anyway be too tired to care.
You don’t have time for anything
My husband used to jokingly say, since I will be at home while on maternity leave he expects a seven color meal and a clean house every day and I used to think I will actually get time to finish projects around the house for which I never find time while working. I could not be more wrong,caring for your little one is a full time job. You literally don’t have time to cook a meal, clean the house or even turn your back for one second – well at least this is how it feels at times. With this, I have to say, my little one feeds every two hours, which really does make it difficult to make time for anything else. Other babies feed every three hours, which I can imagine makes life a little easier. In the end he will determine your time schedule, not you.
My advice to you:
The sooner you accept that you might not get anything done other than caring for your little one, the better you will feel. Also, accept all the help you can get. If your mother in law offers to bring food three times a week, just say thank you, especially during the first two weeks. When your little one is really difficult and you don’t even manage to take a bath or eat breakfast, call someone to help you. They can take the baby for half an hour or cook a meal for you, it helps so much and also keeps frustrations at bay.
Google knows everything
As a first time parent you will most probably google everything. Some of my searches included “burping your baby“, “tummy cramps baby“, “baby constantly feeding and not sleeping“, “newborn fast breathing“, “breastfeeding baby poop color“, “how to know if baby has gas“…the list goes on.
My advice to you:
A lot of people is against googling everything but I disagree. If you are unsure of something, it helps to read up on it and the reassurance that other mothers go through the same experiences helps to give you some peace of mind. So Google away.
Time flies
I have three months maternity leave and only four more weeks until I need to return to work. I cannot believe how time flew. Time always flies but with a little one you realize just how quickly it does fly. Before you wipe your eyes he is done with newborn diapers and clothes and you have to pack out size 2 diapers and 0-3 month clothes. Before you know it, he is not just that small bundle anymore, he gains weight and grows faster than you think he will.
My advice to you:
Enjoy every moment. You only get maternity leave so many times in your life, take that time to bond with your little one. Everything else doesn’t matter. Eventually you will get the time to finish that project, to cook perfect meals and do all the other things you want to do. Also, take lots and lots of photos, as I said they grow much faster than you think they will.
A new baby at six weeks
Many people told us: You just have to get through the first six weeks, after six weeks everything will be so much easier, your baby will settle down after six weeks, he will fall into a routine. At some point we joked and said it started to sound like we will be getting a new baby at six weeks. This is all nonsense. You will still have the same baby which you will still need to feed at regular intervals, you will still need to burp him and he will still cry, you will still feel like you don’t have time to do anything.
The good news however is that you as the first time mom have adjusted at least somewhat to your new life as a parent. So yes it might feel easier but in the end you have changed not him. You will take things more in your stride and work around his schedule. You will figure out how to get a meal cooked, how to at least get dressed and do a few things in and around the house. At six weeks you also know your baby better, you learn the skill of burping a baby successfully, you learn how to respond to his needs and you get a little more used to the pajama drill at night.
P.S.
Hats of to the single moms out there. I have no idea how you manage as a first time mom because I would not be able to manage without my husband. Two certainly is better than one but I admire those out there that don’t have the privilege to be two and still does an outstanding job of being a parent.
What is your experiences as a first time mom? Let me know in the comments below.
Until next time. Lots of Love
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